Wanna play like a top shot financial analyst ? Now you can ..

Who says you need to have an MBA in finance from top business school or you have to work at one of those top investment bankers or brokerage houses ? Just follow these 7 rules and you can call yourself the best financial analyst in the business -

7. When market goes up, say it was "opportunity buying"
6. When market goes down, say it was "profit taking"
5. When company announces better than expected results, immediately upgrade the stock
4. When company announces worse than expected results, immediately downgrade the stock

3. When S&P comes down from 1000 to 985, predict it will go down to 650 within next 2 months

2. When Gold moves up from 900 to 1000 per ounce, predict it will be up to 2000 per ounce within next 2 years

And #1 is -

1. When your prediction goes horribly wrong, blame it on war in Iraq, Oil prices, World hunger, Terrorism, Global warming or someone not taking a shower that day ..